To Live Free!

Numbers 33:2
At the LORD’S direction, Moses kept a written record of their progress. These are the stages of their march, identified by the different places where they stopped along the way.

The scripture’ following this verse is a diary of every stop the Israelites’ made while they were in the desert for 40 years. Sometimes we hear people say that the Israelites ‘wandered’ in the desert. This thought leads one to suspect an aimless venture. While it is true they were destined to remain in the desert until the first generation died the extended journey was not aimless wandering. A new mindset had to be born before they would really be free.

I’m intrigued by the process that took place in this prolonged desert journey and amazed at how similar I am to their plight.

This exodus generation didn’t know how to live free and longed for the structure of slavery. They represented generations of wards of the state and still had the mindset of captives even though they were physically free. Having never experienced autonomy they were incapable of understanding how valuable they were to God, nor could they understand the strength of spirit He had given them. God wanted them to shake off the bonds of minimalistic provision and slave labor and move to a land flowing with milk and honey. They had a love/hate relationship with the thought of freedom and often disobeyed and complained because they just couldn’t believe such a wonderful promise to be true.

I’ve often thought what a waste of time, all those years of desert living when they could have walked over the border of the Promise Land within the first months of the exodus. How is it that they couldn’t see the amazing plans they were a part of? All they needed to do was to believe God was going to do what He said He was going to do. But considering their length of history in Egypt it took a considerable amount of time to change a way of life; an ingrained way of thinking. In this case it took forty years and a new generation.

If I honestly look at my life I can draw some pretty similar parallels. How often God has set me on a marvelous journey, but all I can see is the fear of a task larger than myself, or the obstacles in way. It’s easy to focus on my perceived lack of experience or to entertain the thought of going back to what I knew befor because it’s so much safer and easier. But this thinking paralyzes and destines me to remain where I am. And if it is not where God wants me to be then I’ve chosen the desert over the final destination.

His destiny for me is not where I am. He will constantly prod me forward journey after journey, task after task. The land of milk and honey is a large territory and takes mindful moving forward. But this very sweet spot is where I land when I’ve done all that I know to do and have obeyed to the final step. It’s the peace of knowing that I pushed forward even when battles were involved and fear had to be conquered.

Dear Lord,
I so want to live free. I don't want to be captive to fear or a slave to the familiar. I want the adventure of the journey. Let not fear or doubt conquer me, but let freedom reign in my heart and mind.